Managing Work-Life Balance: A Journey, Not a Destination

Work-life balance. It’s a phrase we hear so often, but what does it even look like? Have you ever really considered it for yourself? If you’re like me, balancing the demands of running a business and being there for your family can feel like an impossible feat. Achieving a healthy work-life balance is crucial to avoid burnout, but it’s easier said than done. 

The Challenge of Balance 

We face many hurdles in our quest for balance: 

• Time Management: Long working hours often encroach on family time, leaving us feeling torn. 

• Emotional Strain: The pressure to succeed can lead to constant worry and stress, making it hard to switch off. 

• Guilt: We often feel guilty for not spending enough time with family or for not dedicating enough effort to the business. 

Practical Tips for Balance 

Here are some practical tips that can help us find a better balance: 

• Set Boundaries: Establish clear work hours and stick to them. It’s important to define when work ends and personal time begins. 

• Prioritize Tasks: Focus on high-impact tasks and delegate the rest. Not everything needs to be done by you. 

• Family Involvement: Involve family members in the business where appropriate. This can help create a sense of unity and shared purpose. 

Technology as a Tool 

Leveraging technology can make managing time and communication more efficient: 

• Use Scheduling Tools: Apps and tools can help manage time effectively, ensuring that you stay on track without overextending yourself. 

• Communication Platforms: Maintain open communication with your team to ensure smooth operations, even when you’re not physically present. 

My Personal Journey to Balance 

Work-life balance—what a rollercoaster! Let me take you through my personal journey, filled with ups and downs, lessons, and breakthroughs. 

I remember the depths of my burnout. If anyone even dared to mention work-life balance, it would send me into a downward spiral of feeling completely unseen and unheard. How could balance be possible in my life? I’m a solo parent with three neurodivergent children, running a business, and the sole income earner. The thoughts would start, then the feelings would build, leading to a depressive mood. 

In a previous blog, I mentioned a conversation with my dear friend Loretta. The power of her simple questions marked the starting point of my recovery from burnout, although I didn’t realize it at the time. 

When people mentioned work-life balance, my brain automatically went to, “I do all the things, I am all the things, it’s all up to me, there is no one else.” This triggered a hamster wheel of overwhelm—too many thoughts, horrible thoughts, negative feelings, and a depressive mood. 

Loretta asked me, “How can I help? What can you let go of? What can you say no to?” I pondered these questions for days but still didn’t know the answers. Then, one day, Loretta knocked on my door with an armful of home-cooked meals. This simple act of kindness was the starting point for allowing myself to accept help. 

As the breadwinner and family giver, I was always the one offering help, not asking for it. I had all the reasons in the world not to ask for help—strong people don’t ask for help, solo parents don’t ask for help, business owners don’t ask for help. I was wrong. There is absolute strength in learning how to ask for help, and it’s a gift to others to allow them to help you. 

I was overcommitted with time, trying to fit the life of three people into my one existence every day. I had all the plates spinning and was beyond exhausted. From Loretta’s questions, I recognized that I was serving no one, especially my family or myself, by holding onto two time-consuming volunteer roles. Over the next few weeks, I stepped down from both positions. This shift was significant—I hadn’t realized how much time and brain space these roles were consuming. 

Other changes were harder, like my time spent taking kids to medical appointments and driving to school. Eventually, we changed schools to a local one within walking distance. This decision had a huge impact on my day and mental space. 

Allowing more brain space helped me observe my daily situations better and make decisions quickly. For example, I didn’t consider changing schools until I had the space to see the logistics' impact on our daily lives. 

This began a self-healing cycle: observation, saying no, creating space, gaining more energy, and reducing overwhelm. I also started a monthly remedial massage for myself, and daily movement, like walking during lunch breaks, helped significantly. The daily movement released happy chemicals (serotonin, dopamine, endorphins, and oxytocin), contributing to my mental well-being. 

Sometimes, it’s about small steps—reading a book for ten minutes, having a coffee by myself, or leaning into meditation and journaling. If you’re like me and the mention of work-life balance makes you want to poke someone in the eye with a pen, take a minute to ask yourself these questions: 

• What can I say no to? 

• What can I let go of? 

• Who or how can help? 

• What is one thing you can do for yourself (mentally or physically)? 

There’s no quick fix. It took time, but within a few weeks, my life started to ease. Focusing on what I could let go of was crucial—without more time and brain space, nothing else could fall into place to start the self-healing. 

I don’t believe in work-life balance as a static state. I see it as a dance, with steps moving at different paces, tempos, and genres. Life is a constant movement, and learning to manage ourselves in this dance is the key. We can only control our thoughts and behaviors; everything else is beyond our control.